24 May 2011
Happy anniversary! While I know that in the grand scheme of things, it's really not that long, I kind of can't believe we've been married for 3 years, and known each other for over 10. Where has the time gone?
One of the sure advantages of marrying your high school sweetheart is that you've seen each other grow up during critical times of life. This also means that you've seen me at my (hopefully) dorkiest, so it's pretty much impossible for us to ever feel uncomfortable or embarrassed around each other. I love our evenings filled with inside jokes and laughter, and that you still think I'm pretty even after I've just blow dried my hair and you think it might eat you. That there is true love.
But as we enjoyed an anniversary dinner at one of our new favorite restaurants, and talked about past favorite moments and future aspirations and foods to try, I remembered something. I remembered that even though I sometimes feel like we know everything about each other, we don't. We're still sharing new stories and expressing new thoughts. And that's the real reason I married you - because with you, there's always more. Although the present is pretty darn great, the best is always yet to come.
And that's the true blessing of it all - the comfort and the anticipation, the familiar and the new.
Being able to recite in my head along with you your favorite stories to share? Giggling with you each night in bed? The reduced social anxiety from having you along with me in any group? Smiling as we watch our baby sleep? Familiar. Comfortable. Safe.
Discovering new hobbies and developing new interests together? Hearing stories of random little American cities to which your family traveled? Learning about your ancestors? Visiting new places? New. Exciting. Fun. And I love it all.
To be honest, I don't remember the first time you told me you loved me, or vice versa. I remember you hinting at maybe wanting to marry me while we were still in high school (driving me to near-panic-attack state), before we were even dating. I remember our first, extraordinarily awkward, kiss. But I don't remember a specific time when we first said those words.
But really, with you, there was no question. How you felt and how I did was always obvious to us...the words almost seemed an afterthought. You've always treated me like a queen, and that's how I really knew.
So maybe I don't remember because I just always knew.